When asked to post advice for Covid hampered 2020 high school seniors, exactly fifty years after I was one myself.
Five decades is a long time
I was invited to a FB group to adopt one of our local seniors as a way to recognize the disrupted year. Today someone is organizing a parade of cars and wanted people to put out our school colors Orange and Black. (Not as bad as one might think with a good design). I don’t know the kids, and most don’t know me. Some have heard stories my son tells who teaches at the high school. He believes in strong narrative but doesn’t prioritize accuracy. Instead of sending cards and bad Dad jokes to one of them I have thought of what I would tell my 17-year-old-self, 18 in a month.
Today, exactly fifty years ago I was in my senior year. Today we would all be shocked by the Kent State shootings. A teacher who I would have expected to express the false bravado of ‘they should have shot them all’, was heartbroken. I would tell myself, inside every person is a person you don’t know. At Kent State there were young people insecure and afraid some in uniforms and some in hippie garb, but essentially the same.
I might add normal only exists in memory. Each day, habit and stress guide us, when looking back many have entered adulthood during normal disrupted. I graduated in the end times of Vietnam. I had a low, sure to be drafted, lottery number. I spent much inner debate on the moral choice. Yet, before college ended so did the war. I would tell myself to do things I do control and worry less about what I do not control.
Everyone has talents and gifts to offer to the world. Do not diminish your image of yourself, just be realistic. Life is much like a choir and every voice has a part. There is a moment when to make an entrance, even solos are supported by the choir. I would tell myself to know I have a part, and to know when to add it.
No, no one controls tomorrow. Many of my classmates died in the first few years after graduation. Some from their own recklessness and some from unknown conditions or an unexpected disease. Be in your best health and do not develop the detrimental habits. If you become as ancient as I, it is good to be fit and healthy enough to enjoy your life and family. I would tell myself to take care of myself.
The greatest gift you have, and it will rebound to yourself is to be kind. There are too many people to keep up with everyone. There are too many great things to be fully in everything. Be loving and kind there is no greater gift than a moment’s patience, a smile, or a kind word. An old hymn speaks of the trophies I lay down, there is no trophy greater than the love and respect of your friends and family. I would tell myself sharing love is the greatest pleasure and accomplishment in life. Stop worrying, be kind, and smile.
I might like to tell myself of all the mistakes and failures I made. I would then not put myself and loved ones through the agony of some parts of my life. I am sure if I had avoided the ones I made, I would have experienced others. Life has its setbacks. We must learn from the setbacks. Accept the parts that you were responsible for and then be better prepared for the next crisis or opportunity. I would tell myself to pick myself up, move forward, and try to perform better the next time, do not dwell or let the ghosts of the past torture the present.
To you the class of 2020 from the class of 1970 – good luck in a world that is challenging and desperately needs you. If everyone in the world lived up to their best selves, our problems would fade like a morning fog with the rising sun. You can only control yourself, be your best self. In life’s antiquity it is what I am trying to be, it is the only gift I can give to your future.
Forgottonia -- Shire Tales 